PrEP (Truvada): OK for Him, What about Me?

You’ve always had safe sex in that you have always used a condom whenever you have had anal sex, either giving or receiving. You’ve not wanted to take home any infection or HIV transmission to your significant sexual partner.

But now you’re meeting more guys who are asking for bareback (BB) unprotected anal sex – and that’s confronting. He seems to be extremely happy about doing it that way. It’s as if he’s suddenly been released from years of bondage and now just wants to fuck around with whoever is available right now. And you’d be right. For anything up to three decades, we’ve all been told about safe sex and the importance of ALWAYS using condoms. For guys under 50 years of age, this means almost their entire sexually active life. For men over 50, it’s a self-imposed bondage that took away the halcyon years where anal sex was ALWAYS bareback and where that enormously pleasurable skin-to-skin feeling was seemingly going to be lost forever because of the AIDS crisis. Now with PrEP, they’ve been released from that prison and many are wanting to catch up for all those years of BB pleasure that at least in their head, was a lost period of indulgent pleasure to them.

But what is PrEP – it’s Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. It’s a tablet that when taken daily, reduces the risk of contracting HIV by 99% or more. Its medical name is Truvada and it’s now becoming commonly available in most western cultures. For any man who is promiscuous with other men, it’s like being released from prison. Its availability implies that now you can go out and fuck with any male any time and as often as you like and you are protected from HIV transmission whether that partner is already HIV+ or is entirely negative in status.

If you’re still diligently using condoms, then confronting the idea of BB fucking can be daunting. As PrEP DOES NOT STOP OTHER SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES you need to decide whether condoms still need to be used. Chances are that ‘PrEP-Man’ is getting a lot more sex than you are, and that quite possibly means that his naked penis has been in many more orifices in recent times than you might think possible. For many, PrEP is like allowing the kid free reign in the candy store. What this means for you is that your new partner probably brings to your sexual encounter a higher likelihood of a sexually transmitted infection (STI). That’s not to say that he will but it only takes ONE encounter to be exposed to chlamydia, herpes or gonorrhoea, to name but three insidious infections. But it’s a decision that you have to be comfortable with.

You must also remember that YOU could be carrying something in the way of an STI that has not at the time of having new sexual activity shown any symptoms and unknowingly pass it on to another. For example, Chlamydia is one of those infections that likes to live in anal areas and doesn’t usually show any symptoms. Only after swab tests are taken is it detected.

All Images Courtesy Tumblr

Truvada (PrEP) is an enormously important break-through in the fight against HIV, and it is changing the sexual lives of gay and bi men. But it is NOT a protection for either you or him against STIs. If you want to go home from this new sexual encounter with a clear mind and be infection-free then you need to continue using condoms. Otherwise, if you bareback there is a likelihood, slim that it may be, of an unseen infection passing between you both.

PrEP is extraordinarily good for monogamous partners where one partner is HIV and the other negative. In a wider context where sex with multiple anonymous partners is a fact of life, prepare yourself to quickly answer the question of "bareback or condom" as soon as the issue arises. In the heat of the sexual moment, you may make the wrong decision and afterward suffer the guilt and the anxiety because of your actions.

I recommend that you take a moment right now to decide whether the price of feeling that naked penis inside of you is a decision you are happy to live with whatever the consequences, or whether continuing to have your partner use condoms will keep you guilt and stress-free. As it’s YOUR body it’s YOUR decision. ‘PrEP-Man’ should understand the importance of condoms to you – and if not, tell him “no thanks” and move on to another man who will. You don’t have to be the party that surrenders his integrity when it comes to maintaining your own best interests.

Disclaimer: All advice and information given here on this blog is general in nature and non-specific to any individual, couple or group. You are encouraged to seek your own independent professional medical, psychological and counseling advice. No endorsement of unlawful actions is intended or implied. No photo used implies any endorsement of this blog in any way. 

THE VERSATILE HUSBAND: Live Your Passion  
My book briefly examines why as sexually frustrated men we feel the way we do and what can be done to improve the situation. Particularly useful for any married man who needs more detail before deciding whether or not to sexually play with men. If and when you decide to seek and enjoy sex with other like-minded men the book also covers everything you will want to know about finding them, safely playing with them and having more sexual enjoyment than you might have imagined.

e-book and paperback at Amazon.com or

paperback only at your favorite online or local bookstore.

http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Peter-Benn/dp/1481099671

For a plain unidentifiable eBook cover edition go to: http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Plain-Cover-ebook/dp/B009V5AXEI

"A straightforward, practical guide for men in heterosexual relationships who'd like to explore sex with other men. Frank, honest and understanding."Kirkus Reviews

OWLS - Oldies Who Love Sex!

Out there you can find cougars, bears, cubs, pigs, wolves, otters, pups – and now you can add OWLS to this menagerie of sexual labels!  Yep, they’re “Oldies Who Love Sex”!

It’s a great new way of describing the fun that is being had both heterosexually, bisexually and homosexually right across the board. It’s a wonderful secret world that few in younger generations would even pass a thought about, let alone talk about it. You can almost audibly hear the gross-out expletives that they would use and the thoughts along the lines of “lock them all up and throw away the key”.

That’s all fine by me, as being a sexually adventurous older 60+ man it lets me enjoy the pleasures of my own age group and older, without being caught up in the often ego-driven and image-perfect world of the young adults. I have a body that is covered in scars from my life experiences including surgical, accidents and natural ageing. The hair is grey, the wrinkles are increasing, I wear glasses most of the time, the stomach increases or decrease depending on whatever diet I’m on. And I’m very happy with who and what I am – and comfortable in my own skin.

I’m also always horny – more so than at any other period of my life! And I’m in a position to attract sexual partners to me.  I can only laugh at the advice we were given as young men that by age 50 we would be washed up, lonely and nobody in their right mind would even give us a second look just to talk to, let alone consider having sex with. Of course, what they didn’t know at the time is something called the Internet.

And what a revolution and boon that invention has been for anyone seeking sexual partners, whatever their age.

I’m an average man in just about all ways, but I have to say that there is absolutely no shortage of men out there who want to have sex with other men of any adult age – or women or in groups or as 3somes or in different ethnic or cultural groups, or tied up or swinging from chandeliers. Whatever you are attracted to that will bring about sexual satisfaction somewhere online you can find it - and as often as you want to indulge in it.

My own experience tells me that I could have sex with different people every day or night of the week either individually or as part of groups. Married men who “can’t host” but are available to meet “during the day, Monday to Friday” are everywhere. If you as a host, can provide a safe place for sex, then sex is yours for the picking.

Sexless marriages are fertile grounds for men who want some dalliance on the side with other men. They’ve seen the online videos, and now they want to hold and experience the “real thing”. Touching, cuddling, oral, anal, showering together, conversation – these are all important aspects for oldies wanting and having sex. I’ve said it many times before, but the loneliest place on earth for a man of any age is the marital bed when there is no sex. Men NEED to be hugged, made to feel good, be given expression to their sexual needs, know that other men appreciate them for who they are and what they can bring to the encounter.

Now with Viagra and other erectile enhancing pills the natural ageing process of “limp dick syndrome” can be reversed allowing sexual intercourse to continue to a ripe old age. Unfortunately, there’s still the evil spectre of prostate cancer and the debilitating and life-changing effects of the operations to be considered. So many men I’ve met have had their sexual lives devastated by such operations, but most do not give up on finding enjoyment and internal orgasms. Their sexual roles change in new directions – previous tops now become bottoms, touch and kissing and sensual pleasuring become priorities and they tell their new anonymous hook-up that they won’t shoot a load but they WILL have an internal cumming.

I’ve played with men who need to inject their penis before play, I’ve had them pump up their penis, many take a tablet – but what is really important here is that they still want to be desired, to function sexually in their own particular way, they can still feel the delights of a hard dick up their backside, enjoy the sharing of passionate kisses, use their mouth to give blow jobs and to spread soap across wet bodies under a shower. Their penis mightn’t do everything it previously did, but believe me, there’s much more to sexual pleasuring that being totally cock-obsessed.

And did I hear you say, what about all the younger guys who like to have sex with older Daddies? Visit any Internet dating site for men with men, and you’ll have lustful and eager younger men seeking out the older experienced men over 50 years of age for hot sex. There’s always an outcry in the heterosexual world when older women take younger lovers, but in the male gay world, that outcry rarely happens. It’s all about “good on ‘em”. It happens far more often than you imagine – and there’s a huge amount of genuine caring and affection shared between the two diverse age groups.

There’s also the issue of retired men having time on their hands to pursue sex. Afternoons at the gay sauna/bathhouse, organised nude nights at bars and bathhouses, underwear parties, nude weekends in the country, friends having mini-orgies at someone’s home, travellers looking for like-minded fun in their hotel rooms, jerk-off clubs – these are just a few examples of OWLS discovering how wide-spread and available sex is, especially in cities and larger rural towns.

All images courtesy Tumblr

Let’s praise all the Gods of Sex and thank them for Viagra, the Internet, social media, lonely men, sex-on-premises venues, single men being able to host and men in general having far too much idle time on their hands so that they can discover their nearest like-minded horny man and physically get together and enjoy the sex, the conversation, and the bonding.

And if you’re under say 45 years of age and reading this, you can judge your own sexual frequency by what you now know about OWLS – we’re a very sexually active lot of guys/dads/grandpas who consider sex with others at least four times a week as normal, if not more. At a bathhouse, four encounters or more would be an average score for say, a three-hour visit. And if you’re like a 93-year-old male friend of mine then you would still be sexually active several times a week.

Whoever said we’d be lonely, desperate old sexual has-beens after middle-age knew nothing - believe me!

Disclaimer: All advice and information given here on this blog is general in nature and non-specific to any individual, couple or group. You are encouraged to seek your own independent professional medical, psychological and counseling advice. No endorsement of unlawful actions is intended or implied. No photo used implies any endorsement of this blog in any way. 

THE VERSATILE HUSBAND: Live Your Passion  
My book briefly examines why as sexually frustrated men we feel the way we do and what can be done to improve the situation. Particularly useful for any married man who needs more detail before deciding whether or not to sexually play with men. If and when you decide to seek and enjoy sex with other like-minded men the book also covers everything you will want to know about finding them, safely playing with them and having more sexual enjoyment than you might have imagined.

e-book and paperback at Amazon.com or

paperback only at your favorite online or local bookstore.

http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Peter-Benn/dp/1481099671

For a plain unidentifiable eBook cover edition go to: http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Plain-Cover-ebook/dp/B009V5AXEI

"A straightforward, practical guide for men in heterosexual relationships who'd like to explore sex with other men. Frank, honest and understanding."Kirkus Reviews

GAY SEX POSITIONS – Videos and Photos to Spice Up Your Sexual Pleasure

Gay Sexual Behaviors:

Ass Spreading, Bukkake, Ball Licking, Circle Jerk, Creampie, Deep Throating, Docking, Felching, Facial, Frottage, Mutual Masturbation, Nipple Sucking, Sword Fighting, Teabagging

Gay Anal Sex Positions:

Bent Spoons, Bulldog, Cowboy, Doggy, Jockey, Missionary, Pile Driver, Scissors, Seesaw, Superman, Teaspoons

Gay Oral Sex Positions:

69, Fuck Face, Head Rush, Jackhammer, Plummer, Throat Swab, Under The Hood

Gay Group Sex Positions:

Doubleheader, Oral Sandwich, Rim Chain, Spit Roast, Trifecta, Fuck and Suck

These are just some of many terms used to describe sexual positions that gay men use to enjoy pleasuring and being pleasured. They also show that there is indeed a plethora of ways that two or more men can enjoy being naked together. So, whatever your sex is like today, you can certainly add diversity and interest to it.

And the easiest way to learn is to see how others are doing it.

A great visual collection of how-to video action and photos that demonstrate all of the above positions as well as dozens more, is this amazing site, a visual Gay Kama Sutra experience.

Go there and get yourself some fresh new ideas for spicing up your sex life – whatever your interests might be. You won’t be disappointed...

https://gaysexpositionsguide.com/

Disclaimer: All advice and information given here on this blog is general in nature and non-specific to any individual, couple or group. You are encouraged to seek your own independent professional medical, psychological and counseling advice. No endorsement of unlawful actions is intended or implied. No photo used implies any endorsement of this blog in any way. 

THE VERSATILE HUSBAND: Live Your Passion  
My book briefly examines why as sexually frustrated men we feel the way we do and what can be done to improve the situation. Particularly useful for any married man who needs more detail before deciding whether or not to sexually play with men. If and when you decide to seek and enjoy sex with other like-minded men the book also covers everything you will want to know about finding them, safely playing with them and having more sexual enjoyment than you might have imagined.

e-book and paperback at Amazon.com or

paperback only at your favorite online or local bookstore.

http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Peter-Benn/dp/1481099671

For a plain unidentifiable eBook cover edition go to: http://www.amazon.com/Versatile-Husband-Plain-Cover-ebook/dp/B009V5AXEI

"A straightforward, practical guide for men in heterosexual relationships who'd like to explore sex with other men. Frank, honest and understanding."Kirkus Reviews