7 Mistakes With Gay Men That Make You Look Dumb

1)    You arrive late for a hookup, or worse still you don’t turn up at all.

All of us run late occasionally for an appointment. But courtesy is always appreciated so always phone, text or in some other way communicate this with your waiting lover. If you can’t make it at all then explain in detail later and assure him you’ll be right for next time. But make sure you deliver on your promise otherwise there is no third time.

2)    If you expect to sexually be the bottom and you don’t douche.

After a long day at the office your new sex partner understands that you may not be as clean and hygienic in the anal department as you both expect. Before you get down to action ask for a shower, bring a bulb douche with you in a plastic bag, and excuse yourself whilst he pours you both a drink and sets out the condoms and lube. There’s simply no excuse not to be honest and up-front – and hygienic.

3)    You talk too much during sex.

Keep your conversation to before and after the physical action. Sex is for pleasure so please, only the moans of pleasure and the expletives of delight to be uttered. Plus of course a triumphant “let’s do that again – NOW!”.

4)    You have bad breath.

Every supermarket, convenience store, drug store or food outlet sells a range of gargles, mouth fresheners, mints and other breath fresheners. There’s no excuse not to use them before you meet your man.

5)    You fail to tell him about your cold sore, runny nose or athlete’s foot.

We’re talking about honesty here. It’s about not spreading disease. About allowing your man to leave the liason health wise with nothing more than he came with. So if there is a health issue of any sort, communicate with him, cancel the arrangement if necessary and make a new appointment for when you are fully healthy again. The interface of gay and heterosexual worlds should be a caring one where we can all play safely and with as little infection as possible.

6)    You fail to be honest with him about your sexual experience or inexperience.

He reads your profile where it says you would like to be gang-banged by several guys, but in reality you’ve not had anal sex – ever. There is inevitably unhappiness on both sides when such stated sexual expectations are not met. If you’re inexperienced in a certain aspect of sex, be up-front and say so. You might just be introduced to it by the most understanding and thoughtful sexual teacher.

7)    Don’t be a stalker.

If your sex turns out to be just a one time event then accept that fact and move on to finding new men. No-one likes to be stalked by a sexually desperate guy who can’t understand when the emails and phone calls are not responded to. Read between the lines and understand that a response silence means ‘not interested any more’. Move on.

These are just a few turn-me-offs that have been consistent in my liasons. I’m sure that you can add many more to the list. Share them with us in the comments section.